Lost Letter

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The pain, trauma, and hurt felt for a lifetime,

Seeps through my pores elevating anxiety and mental blockages.

Constantly placing myself in a self-inflicting punching bag,

A well-intentioned letter begins to formulate.

Fumbling with words to muster up the courage, stating how I feel,

Can’t explain the emotions internally felt,

Riling inside my mind,

Placing blame on myself for not telling you sooner, writing constantly to keep sane.

Taking the time to meditate, making sure I get this right,

Protecting my peace is all I have, avoiding anger with all my might.

As I write, words flow without creating blame,

I write to you without remorse or shame.

I read to take me to another dimension, hoping to help with phrases eloquently mentioned.

Satisfied with every line and phrase,

I fold this letter as if I would mail it,

Placing inside an envelope, ready to receive

Your gaze.

Years go by, life changes occur, this letter

Remains secure in a drawer,

Sacred and only for your eyes.

The Games We Play

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Lend me your ear, soft and clear, words flow fumbling out without making sense.

The twist and turns of phrases falling, you beg for attention, speaking on dreams and goals, you long to behold.

Conversing of passions and desires, waiting for aggregable nods and forms of adorations that coincide with a likeness.

Trying to find reasons and excuses for things that don’t pair up with a running list of wants and needs of compatibility in my head,

Thinking of ways in which personality means more than vanity.

Longing for opportunities to share and caress with another, falling short of boundaries built up, not wanting to offend or appear above others.

We boast sweet nothings when apart, but when seen, fall short and forget what was said.

Relying on compulsions and notions of ideas created when apart, leaving unsaid problems and feelings expecting the other to guess its meaning.

Starting off in a state bliss and romance then twisted into lustful desires and feelings to fill the void of a complete and fulfilling relationship.

Games of the mind, are played forcing reciprocity of the heart without caring for the red flags the mind presents.

Getting others involved hoping for a better predicament, meditating on thoughts of peace and love.

We plan to hold something true and trustworthy not caring for hurting each other in the process.

The games we play are only games of the heart expressing imperfections of ourselves and not the time spent together.